Resources for Anxiety
I’ve recently written a blog post here about having an anxiety disorder. I have had anxiety for as long as I can remember, but wasn’t actually diagnosed until my days in college, with official therapy beginning after I got married.
My relationship with anxiety happens very often in spurts that I liken to flares, often in conjunction with other health related issues such as body pain, sleep issues, eating problems, GI issues, all kind of things. The physical symptoms make the mental symptoms worse and I can escalate to really unhealthy levels. It’s unfortunate.
This year, in February, these anxiety and physical symptoms escalated to a point where I just didn’t think I was going to wake up another day. It was all so upsetting, confusing and I felt lost and without resources. I have played with diets, supplements, exercise and all sorts of things I thought would be helpful in the journey. Since I’m currently in “remission” as I’d like to say, I wanted to share some resources that I’ve found helpful in some of those darker days.
Community.
This is absolutely essential, non-negotiable part of my healing. I have always been involved in communities wherever I go, but I can often hide bits and parts of myself that I worry about revealing for risk of being shamed, judged, misunderstood, etc. I can’t stress enough how much that finding your people that are safe, kind, curious, loving and stable are important in this battle with mental health. There is a lot of research in the category of neurobiology and the effects of relationships on mental health. I’m a firm believer that reforming this area of your life is probably the single most important thing that you can do when it comes to mental health. Have someone in your corner, battling the things you’re battling, praying for you, making you meals, whatever it is that you need. Allow people to see you, to love you. As a busy mom, my favorite way to get community in is to participate in a regular small group at my church, talk to moms that I meet at playgrounds, keep up with my best friends who don’t live close with the app Voxer, and have regular updates with my husband on how I’m doing.
In addition to my regular community, as a christian I am also a strong believer in the power of prayer and community prayer. Though it was not fun and I don’t like being vulnerable in front of people who aren’t super close to me - Scott and I even had our elders of our church pray over us amidst the difficult season that we were in this past spring. It’s uncomfortable, and it’s good. I highly recommend letting others in to your battle, letting them battle WITH you.
Doctor AND Therapist.
For me, there is always an element of health related issues that come along with my anxiety, which stinks. Whenever I run into a situation where I don’t feel heard, understood, cared for or validated with health concerns, it can cause the anxiety to spiral further out of control. Therefore, it is so important for me to have someone in my corner as a medical professional that takes the time, attention and care to investigate some of my worries, explain different disorders to me, medical tests, and just in general also care for my soul in the process. For the first year in Bridgewater, I wasn’t able to find a provider like this, but when my doctor Fermata Direct Primary Care opened up, I found a friend and supporter and intelligent medical provider in him. His practice is a different model that doesn’t accept insurance, but it works for me because it provides me with a lot more direct access to him which relieves a lot of anxiety about unknowns, appointment times, insurance and money. It also allowed us to go back and forth to talk about possible pharmaceutical treatments, stay in touch with any side effects without trying to get ahold of a doctors office. I highly recommend looking for a DPC provider near you if it’s an option for you locally and financially.
I also highly recommend a trauma informed therapist who is able to help you dissect your story, understand your background in a way that might help you understand where mental health issues might have come from and how you might be able to figure out healing through the relationship with the therapist and ultimately, with others. The therapy that has been most helpful overall for me has to do with helping understand the overall trajectory of your life and story and how it might affect your mental health now. Therapists are trained guides and coaches who will meet you where you are and journey with you on the path toward health. It’s not immediate, it’s not overnight and it doesn’t guarantee no more future relapses, but it is good, hard work. My personal two favorite therapy experiences have been with Hopewell Counseling in Virginia Beach (telehealth) and Journey Counseling in Harrisonburg.
Let me introduce you to Dr. Caroline Leaf, a researcher in the field of mental health. She has developed an app that is research backed to provide a significant decrease in symptoms up to 81% in those who use it. I went through a round of Neurocycle back in February when I was in that deep dark pit and I can attest to that fact that it was very useful in calming my mind, meditating, adding in 21 days worth of calming exercises and centering yourself back on health and happiness. The app also has an optional handout that allows you to mentally make it more of a christian/prayer exercise, but the app itself is open to anyone using it regardless of faith background. It does cost money, but it is so much cheaper than therapy. If therapy is not an option for you right now, this app is very useful in rewiring your brain.
While doing Neurocycle, another app that I stumbled onto is called the Pause app by John Eldredge. This is a specifically christian resource and the thing that I love about it is it gives you about an 8-12 minute meditation on God, His word, His love for you twice a day, so once in the morning and one in the evening. The app focuses on spiritual components of becoming “Resilient”. Apparently there is a book that goes with the meditations, but the app and the meditations are free. They give you a moment to pause, take inventory of what is going on with your day and regularly give it to Jesus instead of harboring it all in. It gives you healthy ways to deal with stress including surrender and allows you to tap into the spiritual power of submission.
Mindful eating, supplements, diet experimentation & movement
One other thing that I experimented a lot more with around this time is adjusting my diet to temporarily cut out certain foods, add them back in, make sure I was taking vitamins and minerals and overall making sure I was eating ENOUGH. Anxiety often causes me to function on a freakishly highly effective scale - never being tired, never stopping and not eating enough calories to support my lifestyle. I started tracking some macros, making sure I was getting enough protein, carbs and fats while also not demonizing food and allowing my body what it needed. I have noticed the biggest difference probably in increasing my protein and carbohydrate intake. If you’re not interested much in this area - just taking a multivitamin and going for a morning walk can go a long way. As a caveat in this area - I noticed that when I would include HIIT workouts or anything strenuous, it would actually flare up my anxiety symptoms instead of making them better. This process has been a lesson for me in listening to my body, loving it, respecting it and not necessarily always taking everyone’s specific advice in this area. You’ll know what feels good - for me it’s occasional weights and brisk walking.
The Body Keeps the Score by Bessel van der Kolk
Lastly, aside from Try Softer by Aundi Kolber for which you can find my review here, I want to leave you with my favorite book recommendation from the last year: The Body Keeps the Score. This book was monumental to me in finally explaining why I often have complex health related issues alongside of my anxiety. It gave words to experience and helped me not to feel so crazy. The book was full of stories with people with mental health + autoimmune, unexplained illness, and so many more things. The book also gives lots of recommendations for how to heal from trauma that aren’t just medication related and it starts some really important conversations that communities everywhere should be having about how to protect children from traumatic experiences.
I hope some of these recommendations give some of you who struggle with anxiety hope. Again, there is no one quick fix when it comes to complex mental health issues, but there is hope and there can be healing. I especially hold fast to this truth as a believer in Jesus who is literally making all things new. And, you are not too far gone, He can make you new too.